I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize
