with your own penis?
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
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