Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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