yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I would like to be the first to explain to you that if you've woken up with bruised knuckles this morning, it's because last night you tried climbing out of our car window and into the drive through window at maccas. The cashier chick freaked out and slammed the window on you and beat you around the head with her headset thingy.
Shittttttt.
Be not ashamed. It was youtube-worthy.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
