? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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