went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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