Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
