I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
wow bdsm is so cute
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize
