but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
