If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
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