i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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