it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
