Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I can't put those talents on a resume
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
