I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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