i barfeds in our rink
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
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