He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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