that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
