I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
Green mimosas i think yes
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Randomize
