Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I'm bleeding and have questions
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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