the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
