She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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