Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Randomize
