I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize