We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize