she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Randomize
