I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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