I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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