quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
