508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize