well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
