I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
