found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
Pooping to opera.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
