We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize