So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Randomize
