i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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