is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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