Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
