So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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