Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
