its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
