Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize