You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize
