So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize