I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Randomize
