Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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