Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
