How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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