I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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