just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Randomize
