I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
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